How I Became Delusional That Everything Works Out My Way

I remember being a teenager and thinking that every bad thing that happened was because I had bad luck. Or because I deserved it. Or maybe just because life wasn’t ever going to be easy for me. My brain, undeveloped and deeply self-critical, fed me lie after lie, and I believed them all.

Back then, I focused constantly on what was going wrong. And let me tell you, it got me nowhere. So I made a decision: I trained my brain to be a little... delusional. But in the best way.

I trained it to look for the good. To expect good things. To believe that everything somehow, some way, works out in my favor. Here’s how I do that (and how you can too):

1. I started a gratitude practice.

I know it might sound woo-woo. But it works.

Gratitude actually has scientific backing, it can change the chemistry of your brain. Practicing it consistently can release neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin (the feel-good ones), regulate stress hormones, and even help with decision-making and attention. Basically, it rewires your brain to focus on the good.

My version is simple. I spend five minutes a day reflecting on 3 things I’m grateful for. Sometimes it’s a great conversation. Sometimes it’s my morning coffee. Sometimes it’s just getting through the day.

If you’re just getting started, I made a gratitude journal download you can use. Over time, 3 things becomes 5… then 10. It really does get easier.

What do you have to lose?

2. I assume positive intent.

Someone doesn’t go when the light turns green? I assume maybe they’re a parent soaking in a few rare seconds of quiet.

Someone doesn’t text back? I assume they’re swamped, not that they’re ignoring me. Even in frustrating situations (like a fender bender), I’ll think, maybe this delayed me from something worse. Of course it’s not always easy, especially when you're in a rush, but changing this perspective has been life-changing.

It’s helped me realize that most of the time, people aren’t trying to hurt me. They’re just moving through life, dealing with their own stuff. And that tiny shift? It reduces my stress so much.

3. I don’t dwell on the bad stuff.

Don’t get me wrong, I feel my feelings. But I don’t let the negative moments take over.

Here’s an example: One morning, I was driving my son to school in our golf cart. I pulled up to a stop sign... and the cart just died. My first instinct was panic. But instead of spiraling, I looked around.

Turns out, both houses nearby were having landscaping work done, and two kind workers offered to take a look. It was a loose battery connection. I thanked them, drove my son home, grabbed the car, and by the time we returned, the golf cart was fixed and parked in our driveway. I could’ve yelled or cried or melted down. But choosing calm helped everything fall into place.

4. I control what I can control.

You’ve heard the quote before, but I’ve truly made it part of how I live.

When chaos hits, I ask myself: What part of this can I control?

Often, the answer is simple, my reaction.

I can’t control traffic, canceled plans, a bad mood from someone else. But I can control how I show up in response. I’m not saying you have to be happy all the time (trust me, I have my moments), but finding peace in your reaction goes a long way toward creating peace in your day.

Final Thoughts

It might sound a little “delusional” to believe everything works out your way, but that mindset has made my life so much better. Not perfect, but calmer. Kinder. Lighter.

And I’d choose that version of reality any day.